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cin_tigress
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Name: Cin
Location: Campbell, California, United States
Birthday: 11/28/1986
Gender: Female
Interests: JOHNNY DEPP - enough said
Expertise: If I was a pirate, I would be that lazy pirate that stays below while all
the fighting is going on, then comes up and cheers with everyone when we win.
Oh, and I would wear a green hat that said "World's #1 Pirate."
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  cdshygirl
Yahoo:  cdshygirlindefinite
Member Since:
8/3/2003
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| To subscribers or whoever in their right minds reading this:
The prior entries are those I have selected for memorial purposes. Entries that I want to remember, or rather, entries that define me. Haha, I've forgotten that I posted initiation stuff on here. Or how many guys I've dreamed about written in. I'm so overdramatic, especially when I'm angry and despondent.
And that's the only reason why I don't want to post here anymore. Somewhere back I've lost myself to pleasing others, losing who I am. I guess to reidentify myself, I need to leave things behind. Haha, I have a problem: I grasp too much of the past and end up losing the significance of the present. Yes, it's a weird way for a makeover. *shrugs* But it's how I change myself, I guess. Through the words that I write. So here I leave you.
- Cindy | | |
| "I love you. Good-by - because I love you."
These words echo in her head as she laid awake throughout the night.
Good-by - because I love you echoed as she swam out to sea, feeling the freedom of air and water enveloped her bare body.
I love you - exhaustion overtook her, but still she swam.
She thought, I will not give you my body and soul and mind, but instead I will give you my life.
Then she swam until the world turn black. | | |
| Butterflies -
Carl Jung once said, "We rarely solve life's biggest problems. We merely outgrow them."
Butterflies will always follow...but eventually, with experience and practice, they will fly in formation.
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| Thank you.
Thank you for being careful.
For being caring.
For looking out for me.
For not making fun of my gas. Too much.
For loving my hair the way it is.
For always complimenting my scrub look.
For making me the Littlest Samurai.
For never leaving me with something incomplete.
For constantly buying me food when I don't want it.
For keeping me company in class, even Chemistry.
For making me your Moses.
For stubbornly searching my thoughts and feelings.
For forgetting your pride around me.
For baring your soul.
For being persistent for my sake.
For always calling.
For continuously worrying.
For constantly having me somewhere in your thoughts.
For accepting my insecurities and my OCDs.
For trying to pull me away from bad habits.
For keeping me on track.
For feeling guilty for me.
For wishing no personal change on my part.
For accepting my overwhelming Tenshi-ness.
For letting me a Butterfly so I can fall.
For taking my hits.
For being my post to lean on.
For trying to spoil me...fine, I'm already spoiled.
For letting me take a different path from yours.
For holding your tears so I wouldn't see.
For chuckling at my silly quirks.
For matching my spontaneous train of thought.
For putting me before yourself.
For being open.
For taking our serious, on-the-brink-painful conversations and turning it around.
For always trying to get me to smile.
For making sure I was alright, even when I seem to be happy.
For making faces for me.
For constantly making jokes for me.
For falling in love with my eyes.
For letting me cry my loudest, ugliest sobs right into your body.
For letting me whack you, and laugh afterwards.
For enduring my shopping trips for hours on end.
For watching Inuyasha with me.
For letting me take the radio station that I want.
For always taking my feelings into consideration.
For making sure I'm not alone, even if you're not physically there.
For taking me as I am.
For trying to be my intellect.
For trying to be my artist.
For trying to my supporter.
For being my Coin-Operated Boy.
For being my samurai.
For being my Dork.
For lending me everything for the mere sake of me.
For being here.
For being you.
Thank you. Thank you so much. | | |
| Sweetheart please call me, I'm literally worried sick. You have
absolutely nothing to be sorry for. I love you, and I want you to know
that I care. We're not together anymore but I want you to know that I'm
still there for you. I am ALWAYS going to be there for you. I stayed up
all night hoping that you would call me back. I do miss you. I love
you, as more than a friend. But I know that you don't want a
relationship, so I will wait. Even if it takes forever and you never
come back. It's not because I can't move on, it's because I won't.
You're more to me than a girlfriend could ever be. You're Cindy.
Someone with a bright future ahead of herself, with or without me, I
know that you're going to be great. You already are, you just haven't
realized it yourself yet.
I need you in my life. I need to see you in the mornings, and
throughout the day. To buy you a candy bar, and to get one of your mock
smacks when I call you cute. I miss our long talks, I need those too.
Going on mall trips, movie nights, BBQs, making fun of eachother. I
could d those with anyone, but with you they're much more special. You
know, even if my family knew that we weren't a couple (couple of what?
nuts?) anymore, they would still have let you come here and live with
us for as long as possible. They care about you, and whether or not
we're going out, they are going to care about you.
If you do end up going out with him, yes, I'll be sad, and upset, but
I;ll just have to grin and bear it. I'd make myself scarce if that
would help you, but I'd try to sneak in a hug when I could. As long as
your happy, I'll be fine. So please, call me, and this week, we'll make
plans for Sunday, and we'll take eachother out,, not just for my
brithday, but for both of us.
Love,
Your Buddha Buddy, Dork Face, Coin-Operated Boy.
Excerpt from "Anything for You"--By gloria Estefan
In spite of it all
I’ve learned so much from you
You made me strong
But don’t you ever think that I don’t love you
That for one minute I forgot you
But sometimes things don’t work out right
And you just have to say goodbye
I hope you find somone to please you
Somone who’ll care and never leave you
But if that someone ever hurts you
You just might need a friend to turn to
And I’d do anything for you
I’ll give you up
If that’s what I should do
To make you happy
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